(See graphics on photo above: IMPELEMENT) The procedure of Impelement is being discussed at the Senate hearing right now. Impelement is the medical procedure of skewering a patient to aspirate invisible unexplained elements from the body. The Senate is considering legislation mandating the training of members of the Philippine National Police (PNP) in this procedure. A vampire is usually IMPALED with a wooden stake at the heart to cure it… by turning it to dust thereafter. Impelement.
This post is Rated R-18, I’ll be using words fit for adults only and not suitable for readers below 18 years old. If you are below 18 years old, please make sure you have the guidance of an adult when you read this. When the MTRCB started taking jurisdiction over live concerts such as the shows of Vice Ganda (stamping all promotional materials of Vice Ganda’s shows with R-18), i thought there were jurisdictional issues there… (and voiced this out in classes). But I guess the MTRCB justified this with the fact that Vice Ganda’s shows had 100% probability of landing in the internet. But then, does the MTRCB have jurisdiction over the internet? Still, the MTRCB goes about its way issuing warnings to Vice Ganda for the risqué jokes and politically incorrect innuendoes that are staple fare of comedy concerts and gag shows. In the past, it has also issued warnings to Anne Curtis because of the high slit of her gown even if she was fully stockinged, and to Regine Velasquez because of her plunging neckline even if we all know that actors and models who wear these are fully taped up and pastied. But there it is: game show hosts, dancers, singers, models, etc. all get warnings from the MTRCB for as much as, or as less as, wearing nothing but a stitch, but fully covered inside with body tapes, pasties, stockings, (and spandex shapewear for the less svelte) –– jurisdictional issues notwithstanding. Yesterday’s live show of twerking dancers called the Playgirls performing “dry humping” movements on top of the faces of councilors and guests (dancer’s crotch to councilor’s face), officially called the Liberal Party oathtaking of members in Laguna, presented as a birthday gift to Liberal Party Congressman Agarao supposedly by Liberal Party senatorial bet Francis Tolentino, raised the hackles of many netizens, the video viralling to explosion. The dancers were fully stockinged and padded, the Miley Cyrus twerking dance is the stuff of many noontime shows– it wasn’t those — it was that othermovement: the dancer’s crotch on top of the public official’s face in repeated “pumping” movements — with “no redeeming social value” whatsoever, to borrow the words of the Supreme Court. (in other words, it is not part of any artistic or literary work with a context that may provide justification, unless you are about to argue that the movement was a portrayal of the drive of the Liberal Party to solve the drought caused by the El Niño thru the use of deep well water pumps.)
Even the term “dry humping” cannot be used, or said out loud, in the broadcast media because it refers to sexual behaviors that require careful explanation when there are children around listening — yet, here you are: incumbent government officials performing simulated “sexual acts” that may have crossed the line, and in full view of children, repeated millions of times over in the world wide web. And nary a whimper from the MTRCB Chair. (I hate to put MTRCB Chair pañero Toto Villareal in a spot … but to avoid any accusations of using a “double-standard” rule, he should at least take a look at the material.)
(anyway, this kind of topic, being related to media content, is probably part of any discussion in media classes.) i put the terms “dry humping” and “sexual acts” in quotation marks here because, to be fair, the female dancers put their weight on their knees (knees to floor) to prevent their crotch actually touching the faces of the councilors and guests – in other words, to prevent contact – but the simulation of the movement, shown to audiences here and world-wide, with children and infants wide-eyed, is enough to raise the question of whether or not the organizers and producers of the Liberal Party live show may have crossed the line from being in bad taste — to violating the law. And nary a whimper from the Liberal Party head, the President.